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Posts Tagged ‘Christianity’

1.  We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.

“I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

The first step of recovery includes the following:

  • admitting that you have problems or issues
  • realizing that you are NOT God
  • realizing that you cannot change yourself

This requires humility.  We must lay down our pride and say “I have issues, I’m not God, and I can’t change myself”.

The first of these, realizing that I have issues, can be fairly easy for those of us who have struggled with addictions or compulsive behaviors.  We know that the drug, alcohol, or porn addiction is destroying our lives.  However, this can be quite difficult for those who do not have obvious issues like these.  Their issues may be more subtle, such as pride, co-dependency, unforgiveness, or anger.  These issues are just as destructive as the aforementioned issues, only harder to recognize for many folks.  It may take a revelation from God before their eyes are finally opened to their problems.

The second one, trying to play God or be like God, is one of the original sins.  Satan (and 1/3 of heaven’s angels) got the boot because he wanted to be God.  Adam and Eve also got the boot (from the garden) because they wanted to be like God.  We are still falling into this trap today.  We try to control our circumstances, our future, our image, and just about every other area of our lives.  However, in order for us to work this first step of recovery, we must humble overselves and let God be God and take our rightful places as the created and NOT the Creator.  We must step down off the throne of our lives and let God take the throne.

The third one goes hand-in-hand with the second one.  Romans 7:18 says that I cannot accomplish the good that I desire to do.  So, if I desire to make a change in myself for the better, I cannot carry out this change on my own.  Only God can bring about “true” change in our lives.   Many of us have tried to change ourselves time and time again and have failed miserably. 

Are you ready to admit your issues?  What issues are you ready to admit?  Are you ready to admit them to yourself, to God, and to another trusted human being?  If so, then I would encourage you to do so.

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Everyone has issues — although many of us are either totally unaware of them, don’t want to admit them for whatever reason, are afraid to admit them for fear of dredging up the past, or think that repressing or suppressing them is the Christian thing-to-do and that by doing this they will somehow just magically resolve themselves. 

The truth is:

  • admitting the issue is the first step of recovery.
  • dealing with the issue head-on is the only way to obtain victory.  Yes it will be painful, but God will help you through it.
  • there is nothing Christian about choosing to live in bondage when Christ died to set you free.
  • repressing or suppressing the issue will only keep it from being healed and will keep you in bondage.  It WILL rear its ugly head from time-to-time and cause you continual pain until you deal with it.
  • the problems that you are currently experiencing in life may be rooted in unresolved issues from your past.  Unless these root issues are dealt with appropriately, you may never live in the freedom that is yours because of Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection.

The following principles of recovery work for ANY hurt, hangup, or habit that you may experience.  Some issues include:  fear, anxiety, depression, pride, unforgiveness, anger in general, anger towards God, self-hatred, co-dependency, pornography, lust, drug or alcohol addiction, or ________ (fill in the blank). 

They are best worked in a (small) group setting such as Celebrate Recovery, Recovery for Life, or Alcoholics Victorious.

The Biblical Twelve Steps

Starting with a Decision

1.  We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.

“I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

2.  We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

“…for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.” (Philippians 2:13)

3.  We made a decision to turn our lives and our wills over to the care of God.

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship.” (Romans 12:1)

Searching for Defects

4.  We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.” (Lamentations 3:40)

5.  We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)

6.  We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” (James 4:10)

Stepping into Discovery

7.  We humbly asked Him to remove all our shortcomings.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

8.  We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” (Luke 6:31)

9.  We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24)

Sticking with Discipleship

10.  We continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall. (1 Corinthians 10:12)

11.  We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry it out.

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly…” (Colossians 3:16)

12.  Having had a spiritual experience as the result of these steps, we try to carry this message to others and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

“Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently.  But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.” (Galatians 6:1)

[This unique version of The Biblical Twelve Steps is from Dr. Paul Hardy’s excellent ministry entitled Recovery for Life.]  

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“THEREFORE, [there is] now no condemnation (no adjudging guilty of wrong) for those who are in Christ Jesus, who live [and] walk not after the dictates of the flesh, but after the dictates of the Spirit.” — Romans 8:1 AMP

Many of us hear a sermon or read something and feel guilty because we feel that we don’t measure up to the standard that is being presented.  Perhaps we need to repent and make a change in our lives, which is legitimate conviction.  However, many times, what we feel is NOT conviction at all, it is condemnation.  We feel that we are a failure and that there is little hope for us ever changing.  At least this is how I have felt on many occasions.

What’s the difference between condemnation and conviction?

Condemnation comes from Satan and is meant to destroy us.  It points out what a failure we are and how badly we have screwed up.  It focuses on the problem (the sin, the past, and our failures) while avoiding the solution.

Conviction, on the other hand, is referred to in the Bible as Godly sorrow.  The scripture tells us that Godly sorrow is what leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4).  Condemnation tells us, “You are such a failure! You’ll never change!” while conviction tells us, “Come to me and I will forgive you!”.  Conviction gives us the solution to the problem (the Blood of Jesus which cleanses us from all sin and failures).

How do I tell the difference between the two?

Many times we feel guilty but it is unclear as to whether we are being convicted or being condemned.  Jesus said that He was not sent to condemn the world, but to save it (John 3:17).  Therefore, Jesus (God) will NEVER tell you how much of a loser you are, how much of a failure you are, or how much of a screw-up you are ( So, if you hear any of these statements, it is either Satan, yourself, or others telling you this).  Instead, as a loving Father with a soft, gentle voice, Jesus (God) invites you to come to Him and receive His forgiveness.

What do I do when I’m feeling guilty?

When I’m feeling guilty I now ask myself , “Is this God convicting me or is this condemnation from myself, others or Satan?”  If I’m still not sure, then I pray and ask God to make it clear to me.

Remember the following (an excert from Jeannie’s Journal):

“God loves you so tenderly. He loves you exactly like you are, with all the unsanctified thoughts and deeds you do. He has a plan to change you that is slow and steady and full of peace and joy. His plan will prevail. YOU ARE PREDESTINED FOR IT. And it’s not you that will do it…it’s all Him. You don’t have to work. God does the work. The Christian life is not too hard. It’s not hard at all. It’s about cuddling up in the arms of the father who loves you. The father who accepts you just as you are today. He isn’t disappointed in you. That’s the lie of the accuser. The Lord wants you to quit listening to those lies and take back your inheritance – the peace He purchased for you. It’s yours.

You are acceptable to God.”

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        Many of us (myself included) have cursed God, blamed Him, and / or taken His name in vain in our hearts for something that didn’t go our way. For example, I once blamed God in my heart for not getting a good night’s sleep. Was it His fault? No, it was my own fault for drinking strong coffee too late in the evening. 

       Many times we do this unintentionally because we as Christians know that it is sin to blame God (see Job 1:22).  Yet, in our unconscious mind, we truly believe that it is God’s fault.  So, what is the solution?

       We need a revelation of God’s goodness.  We need to experience His goodness.  Psalm 1o3, in my opinion, is one of the best illustrations of God’s goodness.  However, unless we have a revelation, unless we truly experience His goodness firsthand, these may be just words on a page without real meaning.

         When we find ourselves cursing God, blaming Him, and / or taking His name in vain in our hearts we should first confess it to God as sin and receive His forgiveness.  Secondly, I believe that it is helpful to renew our minds by looking at examples of His goodness in the Bible.  Psalm 1o3 is a great place to start.  Finally, let us pray that God would give us a revelation of His goodness and that He would allow us to experience it directly.

        Prayer:  Dear Father in heaven, thank you for being a good God.  One who loves us, accepts us, has mercy on us, and forgives us.  Please forgive us for cursing You, blaming You, and / or taking Your name in vain in our hearts.  I pray that You would reveal to each of us your goodness today in whatever way You choose.  Whether it is through a kind, loving friend, Your Word, in prayer, or some other way.  May each one of us experience your goodness so that any beliefs that we have to the contrary may be burned away.  In Jesus’ name.  Amen.

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Father, I confess the sin of self-hatred. I confess that I have turned against myself because of broken, out-of-control areas of my life. I need Your forgiveness for believing that my brokeness is more powerful than Your love for me. Establish me in Your steadfast love. Burn off my shame with Your radiant presence.

Lord, I thank You that I am very special to You… that I am immeasurably precious to You… that You love me as though there were no one else to love… that it matters to You about me… that I am the apple of Your eye… that Your love for me is unconditional. Thank You that You understand my trouble as no one else does and will see me through this process of healing. I refuse to turn on myself any longer in obedience to Your love toward me. I receive Your grace here in this particular area of my life, where it is most needed, and I will continue to extend grace here until I really believe that nothing can separate me from Your love. I refuse to reject myself because of this particular area of inadequacy or struggle. May Your great love continue to free me from all expressions of self-hatred and rejection. Continue to release me unto a hearty and holy self-acceptance.

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Perhaps we spend our energy and time trying to be what other people want us to be because we feel that who we are is not enough. We may do all we can to separate from our inner being because we are so deeply ashamed of who we are. Self-hatred is a defect of character that needs to be removed. It breeds the sin of covetousness – that is, longing to be in someone else’s situation or have what they have. The psalmist wrote, “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous – and how well I know it” (Psalm 139:14). Saying we are God’s “workmanship” means that we are unique and beautiful masterpieces – works of devine poetry. Beauty and value are designed into the very fiber of our being by virtue of our Creator.

One important step in the recovery process is to allow God to remove our self-hatred, helping us to value ourselve for who we are. We have been miraculously created, and we are treasured by God. This has been true since the time we were in our mother’s womb, long before we could do anything to earn it! As we begin to see how unique and special we are – embraced and accepted by God himself – our strides toward recovery should grow faster and longer.

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Psalm 138:8

“The Lord will work out his plans for my life—
for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever.
Don’t abandon me, for you made me.”

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