How We See Ourselves

 Recovery  Comments Off on How We See Ourselves
Jan 272013
 

Life happened this week, as it normally does. I said and did things that were both good and bad, other people said and did things and lashed out at me because of their insecurities. I came away feeling guilt, shame, and perhaps some self-hatred.

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So, I woke up Saturday morning, and had to deal with this junk. I started by reading the Word. I turned to Psalm 139:14 and started reading, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

And then to Genesis 1:27, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”

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I then looked over to the right-most column of the right most page in The Life Recovery Bible and found the following write-up [comments within brackets are mine]:

Self-Perception

“If we have lived in bondage to our compulsive behaviors for a while, we probably see more bad than good inside us. Many of us tend to see life in terms of all or nothing. As a result, we probably think we are all bad. But in recovery, we need a balanced understanding of ourself. We need to see that along with our bad points we have also been gifted with strengths. It’s not an either/or proposition. A balanced view of ourself will help us better understand our shortcomings while also giving us greater hope in our potential.

At the end of the fifth day of creation God had made everything except the first people. The Bible tells us that when he looked at what he had made so far, “God saw that it was good.” Then God created the first man and woman. “So God created people in his own image; God patterned them after himself; …God blessed them and told them, ‘Multiple and fill the earth and subdue it. Be masters over the fish and birds and all the animals.’ …Then God looked over all he had made, and he saw that it was excellent in every way” (Genesis 1:25, 27-31).

God distinguished between the human race and the rest of creation. He made us in his very image, with capacities far beyond those of mere animals. God was (and is) excited about us! He gave us abilities and responsibilities to reflect his own nature in all of creation. When he created us, he was proud of what he had made!

Although, we have a sinful nature [or flesh] that came as a result of the Fall, we also must remember that we were created in the likeness of God. There are excellence and dignity inherent in being human that should cause us to ponder our potential for good as well as for bad.

[The Life Recovery Bible: New Living Translation. (Wheaton: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., 1998), p.5]

I would love to hear from you. Do you struggle with self-perception or self-hatred? What has helped you in this spiritual battle against the Evil One?

Prayer for Serenity (full version)

 The Biblical Twelve Steps  Comments Off on Prayer for Serenity (full version)
Dec 232010
 
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
enjoying one moment at a time;
accepting hardship as a pathway to peace;
taking, as Jesus did,
this sinful world as it is,
not as I would have it;
trusting that You will make all things right
if I surrender to Your will;
so that I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with You forever in the next.
Amen.

Sep 192010
 

1.  We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.

“I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

The first step of recovery includes the following:

  • admitting that you have problems or issues
  • realizing that you are NOT God
  • realizing that you cannot change yourself

This requires humility.  We must lay down our pride and say “I have issues, I’m not God, and I can’t change myself”.

The first of these, realizing that I have issues, can be fairly easy for those of us who have struggled with addictions or compulsive behaviors.  We know that the drug, alcohol, or porn addiction is destroying our lives.  However, this can be quite difficult for those who do not have obvious issues like these.  Their issues may be more subtle, such as pride, co-dependency, unforgiveness, or anger.  These issues are just as destructive as the aforementioned issues, only harder to recognize for many folks.  It may take a revelation from God before their eyes are finally opened to their problems.

The second one, trying to play God or be like God, is one of the original sins.  Satan (and 1/3 of heaven’s angels) got the boot because he wanted to be God.  Adam and Eve also got the boot (from the garden) because they wanted to be like God.  We are still falling into this trap today.  We try to control our circumstances, our future, our image, and just about every other area of our lives.  However, in order for us to work this first step of recovery, we must humble overselves and let God be God and take our rightful places as the created and NOT the Creator.  We must step down off the throne of our lives and let God take the throne.

The third one goes hand-in-hand with the second one.  Romans 7:18 says that I cannot accomplish the good that I desire to do.  So, if I desire to make a change in myself for the better, I cannot carry out this change on my own.  Only God can bring about “true” change in our lives.   Many of us have tried to change ourselves time and time again and have failed miserably. 

Are you ready to admit your issues?  What issues are you ready to admit?  Are you ready to admit them to yourself, to God, and to another trusted human being?  If so, then I would encourage you to do so.

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Aug 112010
 

Everyone has issues — although many of us are either totally unaware of them, don’t want to admit them for whatever reason, are afraid to admit them for fear of dredging up the past, or think that repressing or suppressing them is the Christian thing-to-do and that by doing this they will somehow just magically resolve themselves. 

The truth is:

  • admitting the issue is the first step of recovery.
  • dealing with the issue head-on is the only way to obtain victory.  Yes it will be painful, but God will help you through it.
  • there is nothing Christian about choosing to live in bondage when Christ died to set you free.
  • repressing or suppressing the issue will only keep it from being healed and will keep you in bondage.  It WILL rear its ugly head from time-to-time and cause you continual pain until you deal with it.
  • the problems that you are currently experiencing in life may be rooted in unresolved issues from your past.  Unless these root issues are dealt with appropriately, you may never live in the freedom that is yours because of Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection.

The following principles of recovery work for ANY hurt, hangup, or habit that you may experience.  Some issues include:  fear, anxiety, depression, pride, unforgiveness, anger in general, anger towards God, self-hatred, co-dependency, pornography, lust, drug or alcohol addiction, or ________ (fill in the blank). 

They are best worked in a (small) group setting such as Celebrate Recovery, Recovery for Life, or Alcoholics Victorious.

The Biblical Twelve Steps

Starting with a Decision

1.  We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.

“I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” (Romans 7:18)

2.  We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

“…for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.” (Philippians 2:13)

3.  We made a decision to turn our lives and our wills over to the care of God.

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship.” (Romans 12:1)

Searching for Defects

4.  We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.” (Lamentations 3:40)

5.  We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)

6.  We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” (James 4:10)

Stepping into Discovery

7.  We humbly asked Him to remove all our shortcomings.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

8.  We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” (Luke 6:31)

9.  We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24)

Sticking with Discipleship

10.  We continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall. (1 Corinthians 10:12)

11.  We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry it out.

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly…” (Colossians 3:16)

12.  Having had a spiritual experience as the result of these steps, we try to carry this message to others and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

“Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently.  But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.” (Galatians 6:1)

[This unique version of The Biblical Twelve Steps is from Dr. Paul Hardy’s excellent ministry entitled Recovery for Life.]  

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